Script RC 2

12/12/2016

Mr. M

12/13/2016 11:33:10 am

I really like where this is going. Your 5 points are pretty good but just need a little bit of tweaking to reference the musicians over the program. With no musicians, there is no program so be sure to highlight that and the fact that they are volunteers as well. As we talked about in class, point 2 is weak and needs more evidence. You need more info on how the program works, how the Hospice may call families to offer this to their loved ones. You could also mention here how the musicians practice together regularly. Your VO for point 3 keeps referring to them as the "program" where you really should refer to them as volunteer musicians who support this program. It's a bold choice not to include a VO between points or to wrap it up. I totally support that as long as your points help bridge those points together and your last sound bite can summarize or wrap up the story at the end. As long as they can do that, I'm fine with this choice. Don't forget to add that opening nat sound sequence that we talked about. 3.3 points

Script RC 2

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